Adjustments to my new surroundings and reflections

So for those of you know don't know i moved to Belfast Maine in the beginning of June. At first the transition was really hard for me. I was feeling very turned upside down and isolated. Even though all the while the very charm of the surroundings and the people here were working to win me over. Almost instantaneously i began to feel a very over whelming feeling of calm come over me. Sleeping heavier then i had in ten plus years filling my head with WILD dreams. My mind working to decompress the eight years of over stimulation definitely took its toll. Not to mention the month of solid rain. I was feeling mighty blue and unrested every time i woke. Still as everything goes by the rain certainly washed away all these feelings of hypertention and loss.
As the summer began to unfold, i got a new job where i felt more appreciated and had a much better work envirionment. i also started to make friends that wanted me to come out and do things. This made me really loosen up my grip on things. Rope swings and bike rides and the like, i feel bad because at times i was only willing to give so much of myself and am still trying to open up.

now i know that there is a tendancey for me to concentrate on the negatives of life and not really share and enjoy my true feelings about how things are going well here we go.

I am happier here then i have been in a long time, i still have residual things that need improvement on a personal level, which i should have for the rest of my life, many things that i never realized where happening until i moved here and pulled away 85% of my distractions. It is absolutely beautiful here i can see down the hill into the main part of town and see the trees peppered with the colors of Autumn. I feel a growing connection with nature and my surroundings. Working in an organic produce department that does 75% of its business with local farms while the season is here has started to show me what is harvest-able and when.
I am excited to get more involved with hiking, camping and overall exploring my new home and ALL it has to offer! Also to take advantage of all this extra head space and really take the reighns on my life and continue to hurdle myself to a better place through self realization and hard work.
Instead of down the tubes where i was heading several years ago. There are a lot of opportunities here and great people all i need to do is open myself up WAAAAAAAAAAY up and i cannot lose.

until next time! thanks for reading...

Impromtu datenight and winter walks...

after much of the day spent inside tending fire and watching bird TV. Heidi and i agreed that we needed to venture outside for a winter walk and maybe some foodstuffs. i brought my camera along for added fun! i also had my first experience with shabu. although reluctant i must try new things!

Greetings programs...

Due to recent evens i have found myself with a LOT of free time on my hands. i began reading blogs as opposed to to making fun of them. i found them rather enjoyable and began seeing them for something less then an online journal. Fortunately for you (or unfortunately) i am a total scatter brain when it comes to completing thoughts...

With that being said please enjoy your future views in to the tales of macabre of which is my life.

Winter wonderland.

Usually around this time of the winter cabin fever sets in. i have some how been able to delay this with activities i have considered not be normal practice in my day to day life. giving up drinking has been a huge help, as well as taking up feeding the wild birds (winged piggies for that matter) that live around my apartment and enjoying the company of my newly acquainted feline friend Sophie. I feel that more then the next guy I require plenty of reflection time. to mull over recent events of my day to day, noting my achievements and pondering how to avoid my failures again. (sometimes successful)


I often find my mind ebb and flowing through my past, more so recently with out the drinking, i try not to be too judgmental on what i remember but there are often times when i find myself asking why. Why did i put up for some matters, keep myself in that situation, How come i was more interested in those things that seem so silly to me now. Isn't that how life really works though. Things you know and love, that you hope will never end, change. Your attitude towards it changes, the people involved change and life picks up. Interest is lost or perhaps replaced with other things that seem to be more gratifying. Don't get me wrong i do not spend all my time reflecting on those things but they do come up, I am for the most part almost too sentimental for my own good. I chuckle to myself even as i type that now.

Ahh and there you go ranting with not completed thought...

more to come later...


if you ask me snowy days are best spent with a roaring fire, a good book, good company and my personal favorite a cocktail of highly over-stimulating devices around me!